Nobody Cares

childrenOne of the things we all need to learn in ministry is that just because we’re passionate about something, doesn’t mean everyone else has the same passion. We are all seeing the world through a different prism of our own experiences and callings, and everyone reacts to the needs of the world differently. We’re also all at varying levels of generosity and maturity in our faith.

Several years ago when my wife and I first moved to Mexico, we were just starting out in orphan care. We moved to Mexico because we felt a calling and a passion for helping with the tremendous needs of the children we had met. Several people in our circles were also passionate about orphan care, but at different levels, some people just didn’t care. Everyone is coming from a different place in their lives, and they have different passions. That’s normal. However, one experience early in our ministry still sticks out as a point of frustration, and a lesson that I needed.

When you run an orphanage, you tend to have quite a few people who drop by to see what you’re doing. People frequently drop off donations and want to find out how they can help. We depend on our regular supporters and the many drop-by contributions that we receive to care for our huge family. One day, two people came by and dropped off a small bag of used clothing, nothing unusual about this and we appreciate everything that comes in. After we showed them our facility, and we let them meet the kids, we walked back to their car. They then made a comment that I still remember, “You guys are doing some great work, but from here we’re going to go volunteer for the next two days at the animal shelter in Rosarito.” They went on, “If you, or anyone you know, want to help, please let us know.”

As soon as I heard they were going to an animal rescue center from our orphanage, I mentally rolled my eyes; I might have literally rolled my eyes a little also. I thought to myself, “So, dogs and cats are more important than orphaned and abandoned children. Got it.” I held my tongue with what I wanted to say and told them to have a great time.

It took me a few days of mashing that around to come to terms with someone choosing animals over children, but it was a revelation. Just because you or I am passionate about something doesn’t mean everyone else shares our passion. This sounds obvious but pick any topic, need, or pastime and someone is going to feel it’s important, and that everyone else should feel the same way. Orphan care, homeless people, surfing, or Ohio State football, everyone is passionate about different issues or causes. It’s important to remember that it’s OK, even good, to have different passions. Just because you see a need, doesn’t mean everyone else has to, or can, see the same need. It’s about finding YOUR calling and moving forward with it.

If you’re in missions or run any ministry, the title of this article can really strike home when you’re fundraising: nobody cares. It’s so important to remember that everyone is different, everyone has a different opinion on giving, and everyone is living in their own experience. Not everyone you encounter will give to your mission or cause the way you feel they should. We all need to find those few people who get what we’re working on, and who want to partner with us. Let everyone else find their passion and causes that have nothing to do with us.

Someone asked me recently if it was hard to see someone drive up in an $80,000 car and drop off a few used toys as their only donation. It’s taken me a while to realize that if that’s all they’re doing, it’s still more than most people. The more significant issue is, I can not judge them, I don’t know them, I don’t know their story. I don’t know their passions. They might be giving and sacrificing tremendously in other areas. Most of the time, we just don’t know. That one bag of worn-out clothing or old toys might be the first thing they’ve ever given away in their lives; we need to treat it like gold and thank them for their efforts. If a young child brings you a horrible drawing, you still praise it and appreciate it for what it is, their first effort. We need to encourage people to support and share whenever we see people trying to step out and give or serve. Even if they are giving to, or supporting organizations that we don’t understand or “get.”

It’s not that nobody cares, it’s just that they might care in a way or area that’s different than we do.

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Don’t Screw Up Your Investment in Eternal Things

coinsWe are given limited resources, how are we going to use them? It doesn’t matter what we do, the years we have on this earth are limited so we need to use them wisely. In the same way, at whatever level of income we find ourselves, we need to use our funds with wisdom. The parable of the talents was taught by Jesus for a reason. We need to realize everything we have belongs to our Heavenly Father and it’s just been entrusted to us. We need to use what we have responsibly, not on a whim, not in areas that don’t matter in the eternal sense. Below are some random thoughts, I claim no wisdom in this area, just bringing up some observations.

If you’re buying a house, a car, or planning for retirement, you spend some time defining your goals and researching the finer details. Where do I want to buy a house? What kind of car do I want that I can afford?”  When we’re spending our hard earned money, we want the best return on our investment. We need to put the same effort into our decisions of where and how to give. Is this charity a wise investment of my resources? Does this donation have a long-term impact? Does this group requesting my help have a track record of using resources wisely? These are questions that are important to look at when you’re deciding where to invest your donor dollars.

A couple of things to consider:

Give more than just seasonally. Ask anyone who runs a non-profit and they will tell you it’s not only retailers that look forward to Black Friday. Yearend giving is huge. Not just for tax purposes, people just really like to donate over the holidays. It’s a warm, fuzzy, emotional, giving season and some people are making up for not donating through the year. For whatever reason, December is a great time to run a charity. The thing is, there are needs throughout the year, not just in December. A good example is food banks, they turn a lot of people and perishable food away during thanksgiving because EVERYBODY wants to help for that one holiday. Food banks need help in January, in April, pretty much throughout the year, not just for Thanksgiving. The essential work that charities perform are rarely seasonal; people have needs every week. Give accordingly.

Give to what works and has an impact, not just the greatest apparent need. The orphanage my team runs looks homey and well cared for. We have bright, clean buildings, well-kept landscaping, and a large property. We’re this way because there have been decades of work put into it by visiting groups and our staff. Our children here in our home also work hard to keep the place clean and well maintained. We’re all proud of our home, and want it to be nice for the people who visit. So what’s the problem? People walk in, and their first thought is “Well, they must not need my help.” Some people straight up tell me “I was looking for a sadder, more depressing orphanage.” That’s OK, I understand, but it’s still frustrating. We sometimes feel penalized for doing a good job.

Having beautiful buildings doesn’t mean we don’t have needs. Our buildings are complete but we need to heat and light them, we need to pay for hot water for showers and staffing to care for kids. Yes, our kids are in school, but transportation is a massive challenge for us. We need to feed everyone three times a day and pay for on-going medical needs. We depend on small donations to care for our kids and keep the doors open. Looks can be deceiving; a great organization usually needs great funding to continue the work.

When someone asks for a “needier” orphanage, I will gladly send them to some other homes in our area, but also send them with some advice. “Go, give a lot, help all you can, but if you don’t see any changes in a few months, start to ask questions.” There are always needs, but if an organization is in a constant, desperate need for funding, they might not be managing what they have responsibly. I know one orphanage that would always keep one broken window so people could pay to have it fixed. (It never got fixed). Give where you see the money will be used responsibly and for the intended purpose.

Give to help in an emergency, but not just what’s trendy. 9/11 almost put us out of business. “But wait, you’re an orphanage in Mexico, how did 9/11 affect you?” Almost all US giving shifted from existing needs and went to New York organizations. The need was real, but so were the needs of every other organization where day-to-day donations stopped for about 60 days. At this point, I know whenever there is a hurricane, earthquake, or some other national event we will see a major drop in donations for a few weeks. The other draw for some people is whatever is trendy. The joke in some non-profit circles is “If you want funding, just put “human trafficking” or “well drilling” on your website.” These are the two hot causes being donated towards right now. Both are worthy causes, both need to be addressed, but there are other ongoing needs and challenges all around us. Give with a purpose, not just emotion. Find a cause or need you’re passionate about and commit to it.

There are books written about what I just tried to cover in under 1,000 words. I’ve only scratched the surface on this topic, and I’m sure some people disagree with these ideas. But how we use the funds entrusted to us matters a great deal. Give, give a lot, but give wisely.

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